Oh no, not the ferret!

Well it was a fun night again at puppy class – but at least I didn’t end up in the broom cupboard – result!

The trainer met us at the door. Instead of the mad fur blur stampede into class – usually led by Dylan (no surprise there)- we had to line up, our puppies had to sit and wait before being told to walk in calmly.

I think class is starting to get serious.

Maybe Dylan felt like acting a grown up as she now has a proper Welshie Cut, but she was the only puppy who sat serenely waiting to be told to enter the hall.

The trainer looked at Dyls, looked at me and said “It could be a good night, you never know”.

Dyls looked up at the trainer, looked at me like butter wouldn’t melt and did a little head tilt.

Oh I think I know!

First exercise off lead recall. I think everyone knows Dylan will do it, but at her own pace – super slow. In fact, compared to Dylan, Meghan Markle looked as if she sprinted down the aisle on Saturday!

Sit for thirty seconds – Dyls did it. Still no progress on down stay. Even the trainer gave up on Dyls on that one. And despite calling upon all her years of experience, my stubborn little Welshie stood steadfastly staring at the trainer and refused to budge.

I guess the good thing was Dylan didn’t do ‘The Stare’ which is usually followed by a poo.

Then we had to sit our pups on the left, stay still, walk our puppies round us and back to a sitting position. Dylan did the mop and slid round me, all four legs akimbo.

During this the trainer kept talking about moving to the next class and the Bronze Citizen awards.

Funnily enough at this point everyone turned and looked at us. Mmmm I wonder why? Dylan didn’t give a damn, because at this point she was still splayed out on the floor busily undoing my shoelaces!

If only there was an award for that plus stealing things like keys, cups or sunglasses (more on that little debacle later – whoops!) we’d be right up there!

Next check over your dog. “Remember to check their tummies”, said the trainer. No chance missing that with Dyls as she was on her back, legs in the air, rolling around, wanting a belly rub and grinning like only a Welshie can.

So off lead walk round the room. This is when I usually end up in the broom cupboard. And the reason I didn’t- Dyls refused to move. She sat at the start, I held her treat to her nose and moved off. Dyls stayed where she was. The trainer gave her a gentle nudge, Dyls stayed where she was. I was halfway down the hall, meanwhile Dylan was going for the record of how long a puppy can sit still.

“She not treat motivated is she?” said the trainer. Er nope. “Right we’ll bring in the ferret”. And off trainer went bringing back a ferret on a cord. “We got this just today, lets see if Dylan will follow it”.

So no banishment to the cupboard, but I can tell you, it’s a bit of a blow to your ego when you are replaced by a ten inch furry ferret!

But small furry thing plus a Welshie equals not a good combination!

Yes, Dyls did follow it, then pounced on it, then did the Welshie kill shake on it, (at this point the laughter in the room died down a bit as I don’t think any of the other puppy parents had seen a Welsh Terrier in mega destroy mode) tossed it in the air and we all watched as little pieces of stuffing gently floated down like snowflakes.

The trainers face remained calm as her new training aid was demolished. She walked over to the desk and took a sip of coffee. If I were a betting woman,  I would lay money there was a tot of brandy in there.

But Dyls was not yet done. For her finale she turned once again into the Artful Dodger.

Boo the cavapoos mum had left her keys and sunglasses on a chair. Obviously Boo is not a sneak thief like Dylan.

Still off lead and now running round the hall – yes finally she had found warp speed – with the ferret in her mouth, Dyls spied the sunglasses, dropped the ferret and grabbed the glasses!

Now having just had to spend a fortune getting new glasses after Dyls destroyed mine, I knew this would not end well.

So once again we had five people chasing Dyls round the hall – who needs the gym when you have a Dylan- until we backed her into a corner and rescued the glasses, which miraculously were in tact.

Phew!

They were Tom Ford! I suppose at the very least it shows Dyls has great fashion sense!

Luckily Boo’s mum saw the funny side and once again class ended with Dylan stealing the show.

But given the way all the other puppies are moving up to the next class, I am sure it’s only a matter of time before Dylan is getting  one to one training – maybe that way she won’t get into so much trouble!

The trainer came up to us. I was waiting for the words I expect to hear every week – “You’re banned”. But instead she bent down, made a huge fuss of Dyls saying “Only you could get away with this, but Dylan you little toad, you will do your Good Citizenship however long it takes and if it kills me!”

At this point I started wondering how much rehab costs as I suspect I will need to book it, and I think it’s only fair I pay the trainers fees too as I am sure she’ll be in there with me.

So tonight I sat in my sunny garden with a chilled Sauvignon as Dylan did zoomies of joy, celebrating a good nights work no doubt, and realised we are going to be at puppy class  for a very very long time! Definitely time to invest in the winery methinks!

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3 thoughts on “Oh no, not the ferret!

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